Back and Forth ...

I wanted to go on a retreat, but I couldn't afford it, so I had to get an advance!

Now Part II?

Are the World Cup ® and the G20 ® over yet? Now? How about now?

For your protection ...

I recently experienced the slickest new e-mail scam. I received an e-mail from "the FBI" ® warning me that a "Nigerian" ® scam may already have my bank account number. All I had to do was fill in my bank account information, and send it back to the FBI ®, so they can protect me from the evil Nigerian ® scammers.

$100 Million Dollar Man ®

After Toronto's Mayor Miller ® "found" an extra $100 million, mayoral hopeful George Smitherman ® was the first to the microphone to decry the outrage that the mayor was "perpetuating" against the people of Toronto.

He meant "perpetrating," & immediately lost a large part of the "IQ over 100" ® voting block.

Medic?

My doctor said, "You seem kind of depressed. You should go to a good Italian restaurant and order pasta with a robust sauce made with tomatoes, onions, and herbs."

I asked, "Are you prescribing medical marinara?"

Now?

Are the Olympics ® over yet? Now? How about now?

Some Thoughts

Once we've earned our keep, we'd like to keep our earns.

In retail, there are no givens, only solds.

If Michael Jackson's® doctor is being prosecuted, why wasn't Elvis Presley's®?

A text is just a txt ...

Recently, someone mentioned hands-free texting, which I understand to mean voice-activated texting.

The sender speaks the message into his/her phone, and the receiver gets a text message.

The beauty of this is that, even if the speech-recognition software isn't perfect, the receiver will still get a message that resembles dood, im sndng u a txt msg!

Have Nots

As much as chickens don't have fingers, fish don't have sticks.

Callous Aforethought

I took out my guitar last week, tuned it, and played one of my own original compositions, titled "Ow, Ow, Ow ... I Have No Callouses ... Ow, Ow."

I Wonder

I wonder whether airlines is short for error lines.

Cliché Speak III

Brian Cashman®, again, [again]:

Yankees® general manager Brian Cashman said, he didn't intend to add another "high-end player" with "dollars attached on a large scale."

Kranz?

Liederkranz is an "extinct" cheese, the last batch of which was made in 1985.

If Liederkranz means "a wreath of song," does Franklinkranz mean Aretha Franklin?

Happy Birthday!!

Today is my Mom's 90th Birthday!

90th!!!!

Happy Birthday, Mom!!

Love ya, Mom!!

Soupy ®

R.I.P Soupy Sales ® , born Milton Supman on Jan. 8, 1926, in Franklinton, N.C., where his was the only Jewish family in town. His parents, owners of a dry-goods store, sold sheets to the Ku Klux Klan ® .

I Hear(d) a Symphony

I was listening to Beethoven's ® Quantum Physics Symphony ®. Everybody sing, "All dimensions, all dimensions, all dimensions ..."

Baskets

In this garbage strike economy, don't put all your bags in one exit!

Strike One

There's a garbage strike in Toronto ®. Too bad that the TV and music industries aren't having one!

Salad days

I'm glad that my wife brought home some salad fixin's - there's nothing worse than a broken salad!"

WBC ® II

Congratulations to the Japanese ® team on defending their WBC ® championship!

Who?

I don't know who Sasha Fierce ® is. I prefer Chaka Calm ®.

I'm NOT It!

I will not be playing Taser ® Tag!

Coo!

To those who think that a Parliamentary ® coalition would be a coup, spend the quarter and buy a clue!

Banned!

I see Winter coming, and I'm listening to my favourite band, Coldplace ®.

November 11th

Happy Rememberance Day to Everyone!

Happy Birthday!

Today is my Mom's 89th birthday.

Happy Birthday, Mom!!

Love ya!!

Post-season ® in the Clubhouse ®

I wonder why they chill the champagne ® before they pour it over their heads.

What's My Line ®?

"I used to be a computer guy."

"Can we see 2 pieces of IT?"

September 11th

Once again, let us put aside a few minutes to remember the innocents who were executed on this day in 2001 for the crime of being American, without trial or evidence or representation by counsel. My condolences to the families and friends of these victims, and to the world that is suffering the ongoing consequences of these crimes against humanity

Cliché Speak II

Brian Cashman®, again:

"We'll see how it comes out," Yankees® general manager Brian Cashman said. "Coming in, a lot of things make sense and they don't necessarily play out that way. We'll just see how it all looks when we put it together and see it in front of us."

Happy New Year !

Happy New Year to all!!

We live in interesting times.

Why Does God Need a Starship?

In 1989, William Shatner® developed the initial storyline for and directed the rather forgettable Star Trek V: The Final Frontier®.

In this film, Spock's® half-brother, Sybok®, seizes control of the Enterprise®, so he can reach a mythical planet named Sha Ka Ree®, where a mysterious, presumably God-like entity awaits.

Claiming to be God, the entity asks Sybok and the Enterprise crew how they got to the planet. When told about the Enterprise, it demands passage aboard the ship in order to leave the planet to spread his Word to the rest of the Universe.

The movie would be completely forgettable were it not for Captain Kirk's® asking the entity, "Why does God need a starhip?"

Whenever any person or organization claims to speak for God, ask a similar question. "Why does God need you to speak for Him [or Her]?"

Good or Bad

Today, Benazir Bhutto was shot and killed in Rawalpindi, Pakistan. Her assassin - or an accomplice, the reports are somewhat ambiguous - then blew himself up, killing at least another 20 people. It will take some time to determine who was responsible for this atrocity, but chances are pretty good that the perpetrators were Muslims, killing other Muslims.

Perhaps this is why the capital of Pakistan is called Islamabad, not Islamagood!

Excuse Me!

On Friday, I was waiting for a friend outside the Museum's new Crystal thing. He was late and, because I don't wear a watch anymore, I didn't know what time it was ... or how late he was.

Two ladies - one middle-aged, one perhaps a little older - came out of the museum, and headed in my direction. One of them was certain to wear a watch, I supposed.

"Excuse me," I said politely. The older lady got a stricken look on her face, said "No ... ", and turned her head away.

"Can you please tell me what time it is?" I continued.

"Three-ten," the younger woman said, and the two of them continued on their way.

Harsh!!

Cliché Speak

"I understand why people are asking. I'd ask," he said. "For the most part, we're going to try to stay the course and build around our young pitching as we move forward. But talk is cheap. Actions speak louder than words, so let's see where I'm standing come February."

Brian Cashman®, GM, New York Yankees®

Books V

These books might be of interest to you:

• Rickles' Book, a memoir by Don Rickles


• Soulsville, U.S.A. : the Story of Stax Records, by Rob Bowman


• This is Your Brain on Music : the Science of a Human Obsession, by Daniel J. Levitin

I especially recommend the Levitin book to anyone who has even the slightest interest in music!

Sham Pain

In postseason baseball, when a team has a chance to clinch a League Championship or a World Series, columnists report that the champagne is on ice in the clubhouse.

Why?

If the team does win, the players make their way to the clubhouse, open bottles, and spray each other and the [now plastic-covered] walls, and pour champagne over each other and the coaches and managers and the reporters and commentators. Why ice the champagne if no one is going to drink it?

D N A! D N A!

James Dewey Watson is an American molecular biologist, best known as one of the co-discoverers of the structure of DNA.

In 1953, based on X-ray diffraction images taken by Rosalind Franklin, Watson and Francis Crick suggested what is now accepted as the first accurate model of DNA structure in the journal Nature. Experimental evidence for their model was published in a series of five articles in the same issue of Nature. Of these, Franklin and Raymond Gosling's paper was the first publication of X-ray diffraction data that supported the Watson and Crick model. This issue also contained an article on DNA structure by Maurice Wilkins and his colleagues.

In 1962, after Franklin's death, Watson, Crick, and Wilkins jointly received the Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine. However, speculation continues on who should have received credit for the discovery, as it was based on Franklin's data.

So, Watson scored the Nobel Prize, and Rosalind Franklin became a footnote. Now, 45 years later, all James Watson had to do was keep his mouth shut, and his place in history would have been secure. Instead, he recently made statements about possible links between race and intelligence. He was quoted in an article for the Sunday Times Magazine, published on October 14, 2007, that he is "inherently gloomy about the prospect of Africa" because "all our social policies are based on the fact that their intelligence is the same as ours – whereas all the testing says not really."

As a result the London Science Museum cancelled a talk that Watson was scheduled to give on October 19, 2007. The museum spokesperson stated that, "We feel Dr. Watson has gone beyond the point of acceptable debate and we are, as a result, cancelling his talk." Additionally, the Board of Trustees of Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory suspended Dr. Watson's administrative responsibilities in response to the comments, according to a public statement posted on the laboratory's website. The University of Edinburgh also withdrew the invitation to Dr Watson to the "DNA, Dolly and Other Dangerous Ideas: The Destiny of 21st Century Science" Enlightenment Lecture on October 22, 2007.

Watson later apologized "unreservedly" and was quoted as being "mortified" for the comments attributed to him, stating, "I cannot understand how I could have said what I am quoted as having said. I can certainly understand why people, reading those words, have reacted in the ways they have," he said.

Following the controversy that ensued, Watson resigned from Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory, where he served as Director and later as Chancellor, on October 25, 2007.

I wonder how anybody could be so stupid as to hold, and publicly state, such ignorant views in the 21st century. I'd like to think that Rosalind Franklin had the last laugh.

Headlines for a Slow News Day #1

WMD Revisited

Today in Iraq, US security contractors found this artifact:



Authorities are debating whether to call in UN inspectors to verify the discovery of Weapons of Mashed Potatoes!

Not a Morning Person?

I worked in IT for over 20 years. The only part that I really hated was getting up in the morning.

Every morning, Monday to Friday, I'd leave the house, and experience the fresh air, the sense of a start to a new day, and all that other positive stuff. Then, I'd board the bus for work, and spend the rest of the day indoors, breathing indoor air, working in a cubicle or an office or, on one contracting job, a store room, eating in a food court. It was all at least as good as it sounds.

Now that I've retired - surrendered? - I've discovered the early morning walk. At 7:00 AM - sometimes earlier, sometimes later - on those days when I'm awake, I grab my MP3 player and my headphones, and I go for a walk.

There's an interesting morning community out there. Some people are walking their dogs, some running, some going to work or school. And ... the air is fresher, the day is brighter, the music is great!

Then I go back to bed.

Soft On ... Hard On

There's going to be an election in Ontario very soon, and that means that it's time for candidates and leaders to utter those most dishonest and distasteful words "Soft on crime, soft on terrorism, soft on ... whatever!"

A political opponent is always soft on something, while the speaker is hard on something. Think "You don't want a tougher Patriot Act? Aren't you a patriot? Are you soft on terrorism?" and transfer the setting to Ontario or Canada.

These words are utterly meaningless! They are emotionally-charged catchphrases meant to bring about distrust in voters and hesitation in political rivals! They are the equivalent of "Do you beat your wife before or after dinner?"

These are not black and white issues. For instance, if a candidate doesn't support the hiring of hundreds of police officers or the implementation of some lame security scheme, is he or she soft on crime or terrorism or garbage collection or whatever? Probably not!

When you hear a politican utter these words, run!

On the Outside ... Phoning In

There is a daily radio show called Prime Time Sports®, hosted by Bob McCown®. I don't listen to it or its TV version, because I don't get the point of talk radio or phone-in radio or whatever.

What I do watch is televised baseball, and there have been several commercials on TV for McCown's show, most of which revolve around his addressing the TV audience, sharing his unique viewpoint concerning his listeners. In my favourite one of these ads, he talks about being rude to his callers, saying, "I don't call them; they call me."

This is how I feel about anyone who calls my home. A lot of people presuppose a social contract, in which we all agree to be polite to anyone who calls us. I never signed that contract. I consider such calls to be an invasion of my privacy.

Telemarketers, charitable donation solicitors, and others who introduce themselves, and want to know how I am, get very little of my time. I worked the phones for a market research company many years ago. Callers: I feel your pain - well, actually, I felt your pain - I don't want to be reminded of it. Don't call me.

For many years, I worked as a programmer/analyst, and received a lot of calls from headhunters - mostly when I was employed; rarely when I was looking for work. On one particular occasion, about ten years into my 'career,' some guy called me and went into his routine. I cut him short, and told him that I'd contact him if I needed his services.

He proceeded to lecture me on the fact that, if I wanted to get anywhere in the IT business, I should not alienate people like him. Too easy! I told him that, if he wanted to get anywhere in the headhunter business, he should not alienate people like me.

I didn't call you; you called me.

Water, Water Everywhere

[Another] Summer is winding down, and that means one last barbecue, one last ...

Anyway, we have only one grade of water in Ontario, and that's drinking water. So, I was wondering what the heck is with watering lawns for hours at a time? Grass isn't even a crop - it's an ornament, especially around condos and apartment buildings. Some people have decided that it's a good idea to spray drinking water on ornamental lawns for hours at a time. Is it me, or ...

September 11th

It is time to put aside a few minutes to remember the innocents who were executed on this day in 2001 for the crime of being American, without trial or evidence or representation by counsel. My condolences to the families and friends of these victims, and to the world that is suffering the ongoing consequences of these crimes against humanity.

WEBC

Congratulations to all those who participated in the Weekend to End Breast Cancer, this past Saturday and Sunday, walking up to 60 KM to raise money for research towards finding a cure for Breast Cancer, and to show solidarity with victims and potential victims of this horrible disease!

Congratulations to my wife for completing the walk, and raising nearly $4500!

Happy Birthday!

Today is Theodore's birthday.

Happy Birthday, Theodore!

I love you!

Ouch!!

Five runs in the fourth inning.

Nine runs in the sixth.

Ten runs in the eighth.

Six runs in the ninth.

The Texas Rangers became the first Major League baseball team in 110 years to score 30 runs in a game, setting an American League record Wednesday (yesterday) in a 30 - 3 rout of the Baltimore Orioles.

Well!

A national food brand - OK, it's President's Choice® - now sells a cookie called Lassy Mogs™. The name derives from "lassy," molasses, and "mog," a small, low-rising cake. This delicacy, and its name, originate from Atlantic Canada.

These cookies are out of this world! I recommend them without hesitation. I also recommend them with coffee!

There is no connection to Lassie®, although I keep wanting to ask, "Mog, has Timmy fallen down the well?"

From Wikipedia: All "Lassies" have been male, playing a female character. The female collie loses her coat at least once a year, making it unsuitable for use year-round. Also, the male is larger and a child actor can play opposite the dog for a longer period of time.


But I digress ... cookies ... try 'em ASAP!

Forest for the Trees

Until today, when the guys from Grasshoppers® worked their magic, we've let our back yard go [to hell], and the weeds have been really enormous.

Recently, we saw a little bird hopping around with a look on his face that said, "This forest wasn't on the map!"

Birds arriving later will no doubt think, "What forest?"


The most audacious visitors to Weedland were a family of raccoons, whom we repeatedly drove off with loud music from the radio. They didn't appreciate the rap station any more than we did, but a rock station was the one that combined music we could listen to with volume that they couldn't endure.

No birds or raccoons were harmed in this blogpost.

Happy!

My good friend Carrie married her man Glenn today.

She was, and is, a beautiful bride.

Congratulations - mazel tov - Carrie and Glenn!

In other news, my lovely wife sang an 18th century Italian love song at the wedding ceremony.

The Religious Wrong

I'm reading The Republican War on Science© by Chris Mooney.

It talks of the "cynical collusion of special business interests with the anti-intellectualism of the religious right."

"In the White House and the US Congress, research findings are reported in a politicized manner, spun or distorted to fit the speaker's agenda or, when they're too inconvenient, ignored entirely. Federal science agencies are increasingly staffed by political appointees who know industry lobbyists and evangelical activists far better then they know the science."

"This is not purely a Bush administration phenomenon, but it is largely a Republican phenomenon, born of a conservative dislike of environmental, health, and safety regulation, and of evolution and legalized abortion."

"[Ronald] Reagan fail[ed] to acknowledge and speak out about the AIDS epidemic until 1987, at least in part out of deference to religious conservatives in his administration ... who recoiled at the notion of educating children about safe sex and condoms."

More to come ...

By the way, saying that sex education and condoms cause people to have sex is like saying that seat belts cause car accidents.

Say What?

I had a manager who was fond of the phrase "having said that." This always meant that he was about to contradict himself, but it was OK because he had entered a plea of "having said that." Sometimes, for variety I guess, he would say "that being said" or "that having been said."

Another manager liked to say "going forward." I presumed that he was confirming the direction of time's arrow, in case Stephen Hawking hadn't brought enough weight to bear on that subject.

When I programmed for the Sales and Marketing Group at another company, the manager introduced a new project, and told us what had to happen at "end of day." "End of day ?" I thought. "I'm just learning to say 'bottom line!'"

The management at the last place that I worked for used the phrase "push back." I guessed that it was about sexual positions, and decided not to get involved.

Happy Birthday!

Today is my lovely wife's birthday.

Happy Birthday, Ramona!

I love you more than ever!

Had 'nough?

Background:
e-mail, e-commerce, e-talk

Customers are being overwhelmed by a flood of ebusinesses, according to Lou Gerstner, chief executive of IBM.

Gerstner surprised delegates at Telecom 99 by saying that the multitude of ecommerce startups are making ebusiness more confusing for customers, rather than more efficient.

"There are already so many ebusinesses vying for your attention. Etoys, Etrade, Eshoes, Ebay... soon we'll all be crying e-nough," he said.

In 2000, IBM said e-nough.

imac, ipod, iphone

I've had i-nough

Flak Day II

The Los Angeles Dodgers® have agreed to review a stadium policy that bans the waving of national banners after security attempted to confiscate a Canadian® flag from an expat fan during the June 9th game between the Jays® and Dodgers®.

The brouhaha started June 9 when a group of Canadian fans got tossed from a Dodgers game for waving the Maple Leaf® during the California club's game against the Toronto Blue Jays.

The Dodgers, it seems, have a policy restricting all flags, banners and oversized posters in the stands.

"I think they got slammed," Pembroke's Lee Fraser, the owner of the flag and president of Canadians Abroad®, said of the aftermath of the controversy. The group's website was flooded with traffic and Fraser received hundreds of angry emails after the incident was reported in the Toronto Star®.

A week later, fans waving a Taiwanese® flag got the same 'lose it or leave' treatment from stadium security.

In light of the two incidents, the Dodgers announced yesterday they are rethinking their policy. Said Dodgers PR director Josh Rawitch®: "We are reviewing our policy on permitting flags into the stadium to try and help fans show pride for their home country."

The Dodgers have offered to treat the members of Canadians Abroad who were at the park that night to another game. Once there, they will meet with the Dodgers' Toronto®-born catcher Russell Martin®.

The nearby Oakland A's® have gone a step farther, inviting one of the group's members, Tammy Laverty of Ottawa®, to perform both national anthems at a future game.

Fraser expressed satisfaction at the result and hopes that a review of the ban has resulted in a new set of rules.

"The most important thing is that this bone-headed policy is repealed," he said.

For this, let's applaud the Dodgers brass. Common sense has won out on this day.

While teams must worry about insurance and safety concerns, you can't turn the stands into a library. Imagine trying to pull that move at an English Premier League soccer game?

Attending sporting events in North America is, compared to much of the rest of the world, a safe outing, and letting fans cheer on their countrymen poses no real hazard

You Talkin' to Me?

I was sitting in Winners' today, trying on sneakers. A teenaged girl came into sight on my right side. She was talking - I could hear only one side of a conversation - and there was no cell phone visible.

Ah ha, I thought, I know this one! She's talking into a headset, or a bluetooth, or something. She turned toward me - no headset or blue teeth or anything. Hmmm. Whom could she be speaking to?

Then, a second teenager came around the corner. The first girl was talking to a live person!

What are the odds?

Flak Day

June 14th is Flag Day® - aka National Flag Day - in the United States. Isn't every day Flag Day in the United States?

That's like National Beer Day in Germany ;o)

Except:

During last Saturday night's baseball game between the Toronto Blue Jays and the L.A. Dodgers, at Dodger Stadium®, a security guard attempted to confiscate a Canadian flag from a fan, Lee Fraser, a native of Pembroke, Ontario.

Upon entering the ballpark, he was warned by Dodger security not to wave the flag. He said he was permitted to hold it up during the national anthem.

During the sixth inning, the Dodgers loaded the bases with two out. Toronto pitcher Shaun Marcum got L.A. slugger Luis Gonzalez to pop up to end the inning. Fraser stood up and began waving his flag.

"The security guard ran up and said, `Get that flag down,'" Fraser recalled. "They tried to confiscate my flag."

Flag waving "causes the fans, at times, to become aggressive toward each other." I guess he means American fans. "It's a zero tolerance policy," Dodgers vice-president of stadium operations Lon Rosenberg said, adding that the same rule would apply to the U.S. flag. Banners featuring the L.A. Dodger logo are exempt.

Would this have happened on (National) Flag Day?

Next?

As an avid - that's diva spelled backwards - amateur cryptographer, I've recently written some encryption/decryption programmes in Visual Basic®, using Microsoft's® CryptoAPI®, whose protocols, I think, were originally formulated in the late 90's. As with most cryptographic software of the times, the MS CryptoAPI allowed for weak cryptography. Now, with the release of Windows® Vista®, Microsoft has introduced Cryptography API: Next Generation® (CNG), the replacement for the CryptoAPI.

I look forward to CryptoAPI DS9, strong cryptography for the International Space Station, and CryptoAPI Voyager, strong cryptography for SUV's.

Nice Hair

Now that I'm retired, I've grown my snow-white hair to more or less shoulder-length, and counting.

Today, as I was having my returns checked in by a guy at the library, a young girl from the neighbouring parochial school walked up to the counter, and said to the guy, "Excuse me, can you ... oh, I'm sorry. Are you helping her?" Meaning me.

"Her?" he asked.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't look."

What Ever!

24/7 = 3.4285714285714285714285714285714

I'm really not a fan of clichés and shortcuts. The cool-belonging verbal-laziness of 24/7 and triple w [how hard is it to say 'www'?] makes me want to puke!

So, in that vein, I offer some shortcuts to avoid:

1. 24/6: The orthodox Jewish businessman offers customer support and service 24/6.


2. 24/7: It's not equal to Π - that's approximately 22/7.


3. 24/8: The clichéing of the Beatles' song Eight Days a Week.

For those who keep track, the values are:

1. 4


2. 3.4285714285714285714285714285714


3. 3

Happy Birthday!

Today is my brother's 56th birthday.

Happy Birthday, Mark!

Love ya.

Season of the Which?

A mere five weeks into baseball, the sports networks are starting to advertise the upcoming football season. To paraphrase Tom Hanks, "There's no football in baseball!"

Books IV

I've just read Thirst by Ken Kalfus, a book of short stories.

It would be lazy to label them 'weird;' rather, they are ... unconventional. They end, and then it's up to the reader to say, "What happened?"

I enjoyed them. They made me think. I'm going to read more of his books.

Make Up Your Minds

Bring in your film and we'll give you digital images on a CD-ROM.

OR

Send us images from your digital camera and we'll print them out for you.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Watch TV and movies on the screen of your mobile phone.

OR

Watch TV and movies on your 50" flat screen plasma TV.

Happy Birthday

Today is my sister's 50th birthday.

Happy Birthday, Joy!

I love you always!

Sub Marine

Recently, my wife and I saw a TV announcement that the movie Das Boot would be shown later this week.

"Oh," she said, "that's the film with the theme song 'Ve all live on a Cherman submarine, a Cherman submarine, a Cherman submarine ... '"

Important Books III

Everyone should read this book by Chris Hedges:

Losing Moses on the Freeway: The 10 Commandments in America

Pack Up All Your Cares and Woe, Yo, Yo, Yo

Several years ago, I was on the Subway, and observed an [East] Indian lady talking to a Canadian lady. The Indian lady was punctuating her conversation with Eh wherever she could, obviously to fit in with her, I'm guessing, less articulate Canadian colleague. After a while, she stopped doing it, because she couldn't keep up the charade.

I saw a white teenager on the bus yesterday, sprawled on a seat, feet on his skateboard, talking on his cellphone, punctuating his conversation with Yo, without any of the Indian lady's hesitation or discomfort. I thought that maybe Yo had replaced like in his limited vocabulary, but he used both words.

There is a genuine Black culture in North America, but I've rarely been exposed to it, instead to the manufactured hip hop subculture. This would seem to be what this guy was imitating or assimilating. Why?

Many people of his generation are emulating the cool, successful, sexy images of black rappers, rapperesses, musicians, athletes, and other non-typical, one-in-a-million black people - a similar percentage to those people of other races, as far as I know - without questioning the images presented to them by the media. They do both themselves and the black community a disservice by this servile imitation.

Recently, I watched a black author being interviewed on TV. He had written a book, the title of which escapes me, bemoaning the fact that the high salaries and public success of black athletes was detrimental to the black struggle for equality. He suggested that black people look at the examples of these athletes, and conclude that black equality has arrived, that the struggle for equality is over, and that there's nothing left to fight for. Obviously, this is not the case - as Chris Rock said, "Shaq is rich, but the man who signs his cheques is wealthy!"

Watching him reminded me of a late 60's University of Toronto Psych. class, where the professor told us about a book, listing American Jewish professionals, and other successful Jewish people. He informed us that the book had been published not by the B'nai Brith as a celebration of Jewish success, but by the Klan as a warning that "the Jews are taking over America!"

Baseball

The Blue Jays won their season opener in Detroit last night, by a score of 5 - 3. Today is a day off.

Do you know the difference between American government® and baseball? In baseball, a W is a good thing.

Piano Man?

My wife and I were sitting in the living room - she was knitting, and I was weaving.

"Would you ever want to learn to knit?" she asked.

"No, just weave," I answered.

"Well," she said, "you could learn both. One day, I'm going to learn to spin, and to dye yarn."

I replied, "Only the good dye yarn."

Looms and Loons

I've been doing computer graphics for years, most recently building images from the pixel level up. I've been looking for a way to transfer these images to another medium, other than printing them on paper.

A couple of weeks ago, my wife, a talented knitter, bought me a small frame loom [aimed at young children] to introduce me to the amazing world of weaving - one of the fibre arts, along with knitting, crocheting, braiding, etc. - and now I'm hooked.

Her idea was to provide me with the means to produce hard copy - firm copy? -of my computer images. I'm finding it to be a wonderful way to express myself.

First, I have to learn to weave. My plain weave is pretty good, and I'm currently trying twill. I'm having a problem with waisting, but I think that I just need more practice.

Wish me luck - wish me skill!

What's in the Mug?

You've got a mug of brown liquid, and you're ready to drink. Ever have one of these:

Head: Yum, a mug of coffee!
Mouth: Yikes, it's cola!

OR

Head: Yum, a mug of cola!
Mouth: Yow, that's hot coffee!

One of the major soft drink companies is now offering a beverage combining coffee and cola.

Head: I have No Idea what's in there!
Mouth: Me, neither!

Public Key Cryptography

Dignitaries from the computer security field took the stage at the Computer History Museum this evening to note the 30th anniversary of public key cryptography and wax historical about academic, governmental, and commercial developments in security, and ponder the future.

Panelists included Whitfield Diffie, who is a cryptography pioneer and chief security officer at Sun Microsystems, Martin Hellman, a Stanford University professor, Notes founder Ray Ozzie, now Microsoft's chief software architect, and Brian Snow, retired director for the National Security Agency's Information Assurance Directorate.

Public key cryptography uses public and private keys between sender and recipient of a message for security purposes. The sender encrypts a message with a public key and the recipient uses a private key to decrypt it. Its birth is traced to the November 1976 publishing of a paper entitled, "New Directions in Cryptography," by Diffie and Hellman.

Panelist Dan Boneh, also a Stanford University professor as well as a co-inventor of identity-based encryption, said government has gone from stalling deployment of cryptography to mandating it with regulations such as Sarbanes-Oxley and HIPAA. "There's been a complete flip, recognizing that encryption is there to help us, not just to help our enemies," Boneh said.

Counterpane

BT [British Telecom] announced today that it has acquired Counterpane Internet Security Inc., a leading provider of managed networked security services. Post-acquisition, Bruce Schneier, the founder of the company, will continue in his role as CTO.

Tear Our Laws?

One of my local newspapers had this heading: "Extend terror laws: MP's."

Is this a Freudian slip? I thought that they are ANTI-Terrorism laws.

Some people believe that, in some countries, these laws ARE terror laws, used to keep citizens terrified enough to surrender their civil rights and their reasoning faculties in exchange for security ... and not real security at that!

Parity?

Women have been fighting for years for equal pay for equal work, sadly achieving only wage parody.

A Trip Down the Route of All Evil

This past Sunday night (September 26, 2006), the CBC's The Big Picture aired The Root of All Evil, a documentary, written and presented by British ethologist, evolutionary theorist, popular science writer, and atheist Richard Dawkins, in which he argues that the world would be better off without religion.

[I understand that this was not Dawkins' first choice for a title.]

Visitors to the CBC website's online discussion board for the Big Picture, people were asked for comments. These are my comments:

I very much enjoyed Mr. Dawkins' documentary. I believe in G-d, and this belief has a very strong influence on my moral and ethical behaviour. I also believe in the ability of science to explain many of the physical manifestations of our universe, and in the need for the "separation of church and state." Or is that church and hate?

I hope that Mr. Dawkins' conversation with Ted Haggard serves as an alert to "Western" people that there is a fundamentalist "Jihad" being waged in North America against science and progress. No, Mr. Haggard, you don't know anything about evolution, and your war against evolution in particular and science in general has no basis in fact, let alone in morality.

His conversation with the very disturbed Yousef al-Khattab demonstrates that there is no way to have a rational dialogue with someone who combines fundamentalism with whatever brand of madness afflicts Joseph Cohen - my anger at his raving about "fornication in the streets" and "dressing YOUR women as whores" was secondary to my deep sympathy for this deranged man!

Thank you for the opportunity to view this documentary and to share my reactions.

I Can't Believe I Hate the Whole Thing

The recent events triggered by the Pope's statements suggest that, in some parts of the "West," there are problems concerning the separation of Church and State, and in some parts of the "Middle East," there are problems concerning the separation of Church and Hate!

Important Books II

Everyone should read these books by Malcolm Gladwell:

• The Tipping Point: How Little Things Can Make a Big Difference




• A new way of understanding why change so often happens as quickly and as unexpectedly as it does




• Blink: The Power of Thinking without Thinking




• About rapid cognition, about the kind of thinking that happens in a blink of an eye

Don't Try This at Home!

VANCOUVER (CP)

British Columbia taxpayers are already on the hook for more than double what their provincial government estimated for the 2010 Winter Olympics and audit reports released Thursday suggest things could get worse.

British Columbia's auditor general, Arn van Iersel, concludes the 2010 Olympic Games will cost federal and provincial taxpayers $2.5 billion (Cdn). The budget, said van Iersel's report, has increased to $2.5 billion for the B.C. and federal governments. Most of that - $1.5 billion - will be covered by British Columbia.

British Columbia has provided a guarantee to the IOC to cover any budget shortfalls incurred by the Vancouver Olympic Organizing Committee.

Despite the risks, the B.C. government didn't have a proper watchdog agency to monitor the amount being spent on building venues, van Iersel said.

He noted that, for the Sydney 2000 Games, an authority was established to manage the capital budget. A similar agency was created for the Turin 2006 Games. "With the 2010 Games, no one central agency is taking responsibility for managing these costs."

Canadian cities - Don't Try This at Home!

Important Books

Everyone should read these books by Thomas L. Friedman:

• Longitudes and Attitudes, Exploring the World After September 11


• The World Is Flat, Expanded Edition: A Brief History of the Twenty-First Century


• The Lexus and the Olive Tree


• From Beirut to Jerusalem

Muddle East

I think that the following quotes from Pulitzer Prize winning journalist and author Thomas L. Friedman, from March and April, 2002, are worth repeating:

"The Israeli-Palestinian violence had so inflamed the Arab street - thanks in large to Arab satellite TV stations that were competing to see who could show the most Israeli brutality in the most pro-Palestinian manner."

"The ongoing struggle with Israel is such a valuable resource for failed Arab leaders, such a perfect diversion, such an all-encompassing excuse for not democratizing or modernizing their states, that they will not give it up easily."

"Young Arab men were angry because of the brutality they saw Israel meting out to Palestinians on their TV screens. Forget the fact that their own governments had shown enormous indifference to the plight of the Palestinians over the years. Forget the fact that Osama bin Laden never mentioned the Palestinian cause as motivating his actions until he felt he was losing support in the Arab world. Forget the fact that all kinds of people around the world are angry today, but don't go hijacking planes and driving them into skyscrapers in New York."

[from the 'Diary' section of Longitudes and Attitudes, Exploring the World After September 11, Copyright © 2002 by Thomas L. Friedman]

Goldan Rule

Over 30 years ago, when Golda Meir was Prime Minister of Israel, a reporter asked her when she thought that the surrounding Arab states would stop trying to destroy Israel. She answered, "When they love their children more than they hate us!"

I think that we can use her answer to improve some aspects of our lives today. For instance, "When will we stop using television as a babysitter?" "When we love our children more than we hate taking care of them!"

Now, you try one.

World Cup

Hurray, hurray! It's Soccer World Cup time! Another one-trick sport dominates the airwaves.

And, the Stanley Cup lasts well into June, and Canadian football starts soon. Oh ... let's not forget poker; an FSN ad referred to a tournament with all the "Poker Royalty" in attendance!

Poker players, billionaires, celebrities, supermodels, chefs, soccer players, home renovators, bounty hunters ... the people of North America are so lucky that we will never run out of asses to kiss!

Gimme a Bee

Our sports networks are at it again! Poker, World's Biggest Cigar, Celebrity Dancing, and now ... televised Spelling Bee!!

Next? Celebrity Spelling Bee: "Cat? Could you use it in a sentence, please?"

Interleague Baseball

I hate Interleague Baseball! It's slanted against the American League teams.

If the game is played in a National League park, the AL team loses its Designated Hitter, and its Pitcher has to hit. Lose-lose for the AL team!

If the game is played in an AL park, the NL team gets to play an extra hitter, and its pitcher does not have to hit. Win-win for the NL team.

This is all profit-driven, of course; some team rivalries sell more tickets, like New York/New York, Chicago/Chicago, and the Angels/Dodgers, but what's in it for the fans who are offered Colorado/Toronto?

More interesting might be for Toronto to play Detroit or Oakland or Cleveland more often. In fact, teams in a strong division, playing against their divisional rivals 19 times means less movement within divisions than when they played more games against teams in other divisions. The Wild Card situation means that a team that gets clobbered in its own division can still be stronger [have a better record] than the leaders in the other divisions, but not make their way into the postseason.

Bob Rae

Former Ontario NDP premier Bob Rae has formally declared his intention to seek the federal Liberal leadership, but says he has no plans to shift the party to the left.

Rae, who governed Ontario from 1990 to 1995, says he would stake out the political centre if elected as Paul Martin's successor. "What happens to Canada and what happens to Canadians matters," Rae said. "I believe that Canada needs a party that embraces change."

Zatoichi

The character's name is actually Ichi. Zato is a title, the lowest of the four official ranks within the Todo-za, the traditional guild for the blind, which was abolished in 1871. The three other ranks, in ascending order, were koto, betto, and kengyo. Ichi is therefore properly called Zato-no-Ichi ("Low-Ranking Blind Person Ichi," approximately), or Zatoichi for short. Giving massages was a traditional occupation for the blind.

A recurring theme of both the films and television series episodes concerns Zatoichi protecting the innocent from oppressive warring clans and general injustice.

Hockey

I'm not a hockey fan - never was. When it was announced today that Toronto didn't make the playoffs, I shrugged, "Whatever!"

Then my wife said, "Hockey used to be a sport - now it's a brawl;" adding, "like wrestling on ice."

"Don't give them any ideas," I answered

Books II

I just finished The Partly Cloudy Patriot by Sarah Vowell, and enjoyed it even more than I did her Assassination Vacation.

Bread and Circuses II

With all of the celebrities dancing, skating, and cooking, is there going to be a market for Celebrity Freecell? Stay tuned!

Blue Jays vs White Sox

Pitcher A. J. Burnett made his debut as a Blue Jay yesterday. The score was Chicago 4, Toronto 2.

Paul Konerko of Chicago hit two 2-run home runs, accounting for all 4 White Sox RBI's.

Some sportscasters reported, "He threw only 2 bad pitches." I'm thinking that, since he gave up two 2-run home runs, he threw only 4 bad pitches.

It's only his first start, and he's sure to pitch better as the season continues.

Jays Win Home Opener

The Blue Jays won Game 1 of the 2006 season, 6 - 3. Their ace, Roy Halladay, won tonight's game, allowing three runs, two earned, in 7 2-3 innings.

Troy Glaus doubled and scored, Lyle Overbay singled and scored, and Bengie Molina hammered a two-run homer to back a dominant Roy Halladay as old and new blended seamlessly for the Blue Jays in a 6-3 win over the Minnesota Twins in Tuesday night's season opener. Alex Rios also hit a two-run shot.

New closer B.J. Ryan got his first save as a Blue Jay, pitching a quick and easy ninth for the save while a sold-out Rogers Centre audience of 50,449 chanted his name. Ryan came on in the ninth to protect a 6-3 lead, and he didn't disappoint. Eighteen pitches, 13 strikes, a liner to third, and two strikeouts, and Toronto's first win of the season was in the books

Ryan got Rondell White to line out to third baseman Troy Glaus. He followed that up by striking out Torii Hunter and Justin Morneau to end the game.

With his start yesterday against the Minnesota Twins, Halladay joined Dave Stieb for most Opening Day starts as a Blue Jay (four). The Jays starter with the best Opening Day record is lefty Jimmy Key, who went 3-0 from 1987-89.

April Fools' Day

Members of Parliament elect a new Speaker today, and the new Conservative government formally opens Parliament tomorrow, only a few days too late for April Fools.

Movies

You must see these two Stephen Chow [Chow Sing Chi] movies:

• Shaolin Soccer


• Kung Fu Hustle

It appears that Kung Fu Hustle 2 will be produced this year.

Working

Working for a living in today's businessocracy has become an ugly and stupid game, upgraded from a merely unpleasant game.

Statics

Statics is the branch of physics concerned with physical systems in static equilibrium, that is, in a state where the relative positions of subsystems do not vary over time, or where components and structures are at rest under the action of external forces of equilibrium. When in static equilibrium, the system is either at rest, or moving at constant velocity through its center of mass.

By Newton's second law, this situation implies that the net force and net torque (also known as moment) on every body in the system is zero, meaning that for every force bearing upon a member, there must be an equal and opposite force. From this constraint, such quantities as stress or pressure can be derived. The net forces equalling zero is known as the first condition for equilibrium, and the net torque equalling zero is known as the second condition for equilibrium.

Three things to remember:

• At its most basic, Moment = Force * Distance


• Moments about a point net to zero, and


• You can't push a rope!

What is this all about? Statics is a part of Physics, but my high school included it in Grade 13 Trig. I never know what hit me - but my mark in Trig was well on its way to netting to zero.

Random Numbers

Robert R. Coveyou of Oak Ridge National Laboratory once titled an article, "The Generation of Random Numbers is Too Important to be Left to Chance."

Bread and Circuses

First, we suffered through a decade of who smokes the biggest cigar.

Now, everybody plays poker and , even better, watches televised poker or Celebrity poker. Personally, I'm looking forward to watching Celebrity Solitaire, which promises to be even more exciting.

Wait ... this just in: Celebrities smoking cigars while playing Celebrity Freecell.

A dream come true!!

Books

Reading some excellent books:

• Assassination Vacation by Sarah Vowell


• Body of Secrets by James Bamford


• Coincidences, Chaos, and All That Math Jazz by Edward B. Burger & Michael Starbird

World Baseball Classic

Congratulations to winner Team Japan and runner-up Team Cuba.

The rules need tweaking, but the baseball was great.

Team Japan manager Sadaharu Oh:



So, if Team Japan are the World Champions, what is the status of the Chicago White Sox, and their 2006 counterparts?

Final Four

I thought it was a comic book. Who knew?